Ok, let me think back to what seems like years ago but was actually like 2 weeks.  I got all the plants in the ground finally.  Only a few of them didn't survive the transplant which is better than last year.  But one of these days I AM going to get some of Paula's plum trees to grow in my yard!!  RRGHH!

But on the upside, FIL brought me two sand plums that he mail ordered and they're doing great.

The lilac I brought home was looking good for a few days but then I tried to make it stand up straighter and I must have broken roots or something because it went downhill pretty fast after that.  The thing I'm the most upset about is the passionflower didn't make it.  That's another one I'm determined to grow eventually.

The cypress vine, Jerusalem artichokes, hyacinth bean, black&blue salvia, Laura Bush petunia, purple garlic, autumn joy sedum, and the unknown purple leaved thing are all doing well.  The cuban oregano can't decide yet.  I think the main growing tip may die and all the little shoots around the base will end up doing ok.  Not sure on the lilies.  They look stressed but are still making new leaves.    There's another something-or-other in the sun bed that I can't remember the name of.  It looks like it might be in the salvia/sage/mint family.   The hummingbird sage died but I think its a butterfly plant of some kind.  Should be a fun suprise.

Oh, and I'll get to the reason for my being home today later...

I'm having one of my favorite rainy day lunches: egg drop soup.  It is so easy!  Heat a can of chicken broth to simmering, turn off the heat, and drizzle 2 beaten eggs into it.  It is just as good or better than restaraunt soup.  160 calories and almost all from protein.  It is suprisingly filling too!

I've got mixed beans in the crock pot for dinner.  Yum!

So here's the plumbing saga:

For a little while, we were thinking that something died in the air vent system.  We tried waiting it out but it didn't go away.  So last week DH checked all the vents and noticed that the one by the stove had the concentrated gross smell and had reduced flow.  There was no way I was investigating that one myself so we called Roto Rooter.  Apparently the plumbing pipes under the kitchen had broken and all the waste water from the washing machine, dishwasher, and kitchen sink (read: garbage disposal) was leaking into the air duct.  They said they could jackhammer up the kitchen floor and replace the broken section.  We'd have to get new flooring and possibly new cabinets and counters depending on how much they destroyed.  I was not particularly happy with that because I like my kitchen the way it is.  But I thought I'd be a good sport and think about what kind of tile I wanted since right now we have stick down tile.  It is in good condition and matches the rest of the kitchen perfectly but it is linoleum so it would be nice to have an upgrade.  But the cabinets are hand stained and I don't think they'd be matchable by anyone except the very best.  Insurance doesn't pay for the very best.

Insurance also wanted a second opinion, so we called out Rick the Plumber who was recommended by one of DH's friends.  He ran the camera down under the floor just like Roto Rooter.  He said he could reroute the plumbing on the outside of our house, save the kitchen, and fix the underlying problem (old, disentegrating cast iron pipes) for just a little more than Roto Rooter, plus, no kitchen remodel costs.  He said Roto Rooter does that all the time; they say they'll make a 2' x 2' hole in the floor and patch the problem even though they know full well that the pipe will keep falling apart across the entire area.  We used to be happy with Roto Rooter but now we are pretty impressed with this Rick guy.

We then had OKAir come out and look at the air ducts and give an estimate on rerouting the entire system to run through the celing instead of the slab.  Insurance didn't go for that at all but it was a long shot anyway.  They'll pay for a cleaning and sanitization of the duct system.  Since there's pretty much no chance of this problem happening again with the rerouted plumbing, we're cool with that. 

So we set it all up and Rick is going to come on Friday (today) to fix the plumbing and we can start using our laundry and kitchen again.  Yeah.  No sink, dishwasher, washing machine, or air conditioner for this whole process.  Well, then Oklahoma happened.  More specifically, the rain.  We called him yesterday to make sure he wasn't going to cancel due to rain and he said he'd be here no matter what.  So I take off work to babysit.   Guess what?  This morning, at his scheduled appointment time he cancels.  He cites the lightning as a problem for his equipment.  So now I'm a little less impressed with Rick the Plumber. 

Blackmon Mooring is coming tonight to clean the ducts so at least we'll have air conditioning again tomorrow when it's supposed to be 88F.

The rain has moved on and the birds seem to be making up for lost time.  Everyone is singing at the top of their lungs.  I texted DH to see if the plumber can come now that it isn't lightninging.

Ok, my belly is full and I have no more motivation to blog right now so I'll post this one and come back later to finish up.  Nap time.

Wrapping up some stuff

Mom brought it to my attention that I never finished the story of the lost snake.  Well!  He'd been gone a few days and  one evening I had to run to the store real quick because I was out of something for baking.  I forgot my phone.  As I drove up the street back home I noticed DH out front waving at me in the way that you know something's not ok.  So I stop before the garage and he tells me the snake is in the laundry room and he isn't happy (the snake).  The cats were apparently harassing him and he was all slithering around and hissing at them.  So I'm like, great!  He's not dead!  I look under, over, and inside everything in the entire room.  No snake.  I heat up a mouse to see if he's hungry.  Nothing.  So I give up for the night.  The next night I'm in the kitchen and Bones is sitting on the floor looking at the refrigerator.  It crosses my mind as something odd for Bones to be doing but I dismiss it.  I even move him out of the way to get in the fridge at one point.  As soon as I closed the door Bones was right back in the spot, staring intently at the space between the fridge and the cabinet.  Picture a cartoon light bulb above my head at this point. 

So we move the fridge out and there's Garak, looking pretty upset that we stole his heat source.  We couldn't get the fridge out far enough for me to feel comfortable getting back there with an angry snake, so we messed with him until he came out and started trying to find a place to hide under the cabinets.  He was easy to grab at that point.   So now we have Garak back and Bones saved the day.

Skipping ahead... My Hoya pubicalyx 'Red Buttons' is blooming.  I got a generous cutting about a year ago from one of the hoya folk and it's been trying to bloom since I got it but the buds kept blasting.  It's finally stable enough!  I say "finally"; it's a minor miracle to see blooms this soon.

Bones thinks it's cool.

He and DH like the smell of the blooms better than me.  I think they're too musty.



I'll have lots more exciting tales to tell soon.  We have a major plumbing ...thing.  We have plans for a new lawn.  And we're going camping tomorrow.  And I'm going to bed now so you'll have to wait for the rest of it.

Recent Pictures and Backyard Tour.

The tomato container garden is finished.  I am tired and sunburned but happy.  I still have lots more things to plant but I'm going to take a break for a while.

This is a dry line forming just east of us...again.  It was a few weeks ago.  We're supposedly getting storms in the next few days though.

Here's the sunset that night.

I picked up this Hoya wayetti at Lowes

Here's the nest that the House Finches are building in my Krimson Princess

At the arts festival there was a place where you could decorate your own pottery and they would fire it Raku style.  It was cool.

Here' the tomato container garden.

Here is the herb container.  It has rosemary, cuban oregano, stevia, regular oregano, pineapple sage, and thyme.

Here's the orange climbing rose.  It isn't growing very fast.

This is the native grapevine.  I need to get a female to go with it.

Here's the hyacinth bean

The irises.  Only the purple ones had blooms and not very many.  Time to divide.

The fig tree sent to me by DH's grandmother.  Can't wait for figs!!

Don't know what this is so I'm letting it flower.  This is a good year to let the volunteer plants in the yard flower since the grass isn't growing and I don't have to mow.

There are sand plums here.  You'll have to trust me.

The Quest for Humanity

Work got worse before it got better.  I got a talking-to from Chris because I was crying so much.  I had tried to implement my plan from before but it didn't work so I made a new plan.  I would be totally subservient.  I'm not very good at that so I wore a "reminder bracelet" made out of bright orange paper for a few days.  It helped me change my behavior.  So then I was really miserable and crying a lot and Chris called me into the conference room.  I figured that was the end of my employment.  But he told me how I was being perceived and have always been perceived by at least him and probably lots of people.  Since I'm so bad at social stuff, I had no idea.  I wish someone had made me aware of this stuff earlier.  Apparently I'm anti-authority.  In reality, I respect authority and have an irrational fear of being in trouble.  I try to do everything correctly and/or the way my boss wants me to do it.  Others think I have no confidence in my ability to do good work.  I know I do good work but I always try to do it perfectly.  If it isn't the most perfect, I need to improve.  I'm afraid that if I acknowledge my strengths too much, I'll be proud or cocky and that's one of the worst things that you can be (in my brain).  Others think I have a bad attitude.  I've always known that I'm perceived that way.  My whole life I've heard, "You need an attitude adjustment."  Trust me, if I had any idea at all how to do that, I would be the first to make it happen.  How does one adjust an attitude?  Am I supposed to act happy?  I can't do that.  I am what I am.  If I'm upset, you know.  My face looks upset.  My posture looks upset.  If I'm not upset, I have a neutral face.  If I'm happy, I have a neutral face.  Apparently, having a neutral face and stating problems factually and offering suggestions for improvement means I have a bad attitude.  I think it means I'm a member of the Autism Spectrum Community, but whatever.  Also, my lifelong struggle with depression is difficult to mask.  I think Chris/people misinterpret my depression as a personal attack on them or the way things are.  When I try to say the right things and have a happy face it comes out all wrong and it looks and sounds really sarcastic and I get in even more trouble.  I guess others know how to do that better.  When I am genuinely happy I am more lively and it is easier for me to smile at things and have a pleasant tone to my voice.  My coworkers seem to like me that way but some of the examples that Chris gave were from times when I was genuinely happy and I had thought I communicated effectively and had a really good attitude.  Guess not.  I must not know what the definition of attitude is.

So Chris said I deserved to be fired 20 times over (during my time there) but my work quality is really good and he believes I have the ability to change how others perceive me.  That causes me to have lots of overwhelming and conflicting emotions.  I feel ashamed and thankful and indebted and hopeful and lots of things that don't have names.  He recommended I read "How To Win Friends and Influence People".  I don't really want more friends or to have lots of influence but I'm hoping that the social truths outlined in the book will help me with my goals.  Basically, I need all those unwritten rules of human behavior to be written down.  I don't intuitively know that stuff. Mom had to teach me about personal space when I was a teenager.  I have to study others very intensely to unravel their behavior so I can emulate it.  I can't just act like them; I have to break everything down into it's components and analyze them before I can put them back together in my own body.  Eye movements, hand positions, posture, face muscles- all of it has to be worked with seperately.  When I was a kid, I even had to practice the component parts of behavior separately so my muscles could learn what to do.  Does everyone do this or is it just me?  I have no idea.  I only know my own internal experience.

I remember practicing pain tolerence.  As a kid I had no pain tolerence whatsoever.  I had to learn that even though I feel pain at a low threshold, I can tolerate high levels without hysteria.  I've always been a scientist.  I needed a way to administer controlled amounts of pain so I could practice feeling the sensation and not reacting.  We had an old porch swing in the yard.  I would hang from the top bar and let the swing hit my shins at slowly increasing speeds until I had built a pretty high tolerence.  Then when I experienced other pain I could channel my coping skills and tolerate the sensations.  It sounds really horrible but would it be better for me to be screaming and throwing fits at the tiniest twinge as an adult?  I used the knowledge and tools I had on hand to acheive more social normality, even though the methods were not normal.  I did the same thing with sound.  I used the loudness in band to train myself to tolerate loud noises without reaction.  I learned that when I was part of the noise creation, it didn't hurt as much.  I remember times when I would hear something loud and I would yell or scream along with the noise so my ears didn't hurt so bad.  I don't have to do that now, fortunately!  But I do still experience more noise pain than others seem to.

The other day I accidentally let both my legs fall asleep.  I take care to not let that happen normally.  It took a good 10 minutes to get the pain to a tolerable level.  When I was younger I would have been freaking out.  The pain was significant, some of the highest levels I've experienced in recent memory.  So I stood in the doorway, holding onto the doorjam and rode it out.  I couldn't move or sit.  I thought about falling over but the risk of other injury was too high.  But I did a good job; no one noticed that I was writhing in the doorway to the supply room for 10 minutes.

So it is time for another phase of my attempts to be like a normal human.  I have been looking for an opportunity to stretch myself and have challenges, but this isn't what I had in mind.  I was hoping to transfer to the mailing department.  But I do think it is a good thing.  You can't always get what you want...but sometimes you find what you need. 

OMG!!

Things are crazy!  Crazy at work and crazy at home.  When I'm not at work I'm trying to get all my new plants in the ground and watered.  I'm having a hard time keeping up.  There just isn't enough time.    And I've been really tired all week too so I've been going to bed early.  So I'm going to continue to do that and hopefully things will calm down enough soon that I can tell you all about it.

RAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It just started to drizzle a little while ago.  It is beautiful!

Ok.  So I changed the way my blog looks a little.  It is a little harder to read I think.  But it looks pretty.  If the font makes it difficult for you to read, let me know and I'll pick another.  There are lots to choose from.

On the work front:  L. said that the area manager is in charge of the flowerbeds.  I told her I needed to have guidelines so I know what my responsibilties are and what I'm not supposed to do.  She said she'd talk to the relevent people.  Of course, the area manager was on vacation this week.  So all the plants I bought are still waiting to be planted.  Deep Breath...

I had a meeting with the president.  You know what, I'm going to use names instead of titles.  The names are common enough I think.  I don't want to get myself or anyone in trouble.  So anyway.  I talked to Chris.  I said I needed some advice.  I didn't know what to do when the things Richard wants are different from the things he wants.  I gave him examples of issues we were having with each other.  He said in his experience, many of these sorts of problems disappear as the new supervisor becomes more comfortable.  He said in the beginning it seems like everything is coming at you really fast and you feel overwhelmed and you overeact to things.  He told me to try to understand Richard's point of view.  I was trying to do that already but I didn't really know all the different factors that new supervisors deal with.  But, armed with more information I think I have been able to work with him better.  Chris also said to give it a month and any problems that hadn't resolved by then could be delt with.  He really helped me to get a new perspective on things.  He would take a situation where I thought Richard and Chris felt very differently and he would help me look for ways that they were both right.  That was very helpful.  As a scientist, I feel that things are either correct or not correct.  It is difficult to grasp that two seemingly opposite points of view could both be correct.  He also pointed out that Richard is probably feeling a lot more overwhelmed and inadequate than he lets on.  When it seems like he's panicking or overeacting, it is probably that he's trying to prevent mistakes and other problems because he feels the pressure of everything being on his shoulders.

That evening Froggi came over to hang out and decorate cookies and I talked to her about Richard and my talk with Chris.  She added that his definition of teamwork is exactly the military's definition.  My definition is different than that but I think I understand his side a little more.  You do your job the best you can so that the next person can do their job.  I get that.  I guess I feel that we're beyond that.  Doing my job well is second nature to me.  It takes little effort.  I have a lot left over and I want to use it to help others do their jobs better and to anticipate the needs of others and my future needs.  I feel that teamwork means bettering the company as a whole by not only doing my job well, but assisting others to do their jobs well.  I think it will just take some time for Richard and I to be on the same page and for him to have confidence that I will do my job well without extra/outside motivation.  I think as I continue to prove myself by producing quality work and simultaneously reducing the workload of others, he'll relax.

The final realization came yesterday.  All this time I thought that he was upset with me all the time and was always questioning everything I did.  Around lunchtime there were two separate conversations where he said something, I thought I was in trouble, and he said I wasn't; he had an idea or he was just relaying information to me.  I had an epiphany!  He has the same tone of voice, the same facial expression, the same sentence structure, and the same intensity whether he's upset about something or not.  When he comes over and "accuses" me of doing something on a job, it's actually a simple question with no irritation attached.  It just seems like he's irritated.  When he brings a new job to my attention, he's not upset at me for not already doing it.  He's simply giving me information.  Talk about a light bulb moment.  The afternoon went better than the last few weeks have!

I already have practice with this sort of thing.  DH used to phrase his questions like commands.  Everyone always thought he was controlling and rude and abrasive but I knew it was a simple question.  No attitude or emotion was intended.  I have helped him learn to rephrase things to be less offensive and he gets along better with everyone, including me.  Because sometimes, even I would misinterpret him and we'd have to fight about it before realizing it was a misunderstanding.  That still happens a little but we are doing much better.  But anyway, I can use that experience with Richard and I think I can interpret him much better in the future.  It'll be very relieving to not be on the defensive all the time.  I knew I shouldn't automatically be defensive but it was a quick subconsious reaction to his (perceived) tone.  Happy days are ahead.

Now that I have Richard at least partially figured out, I have more confidence in my work and myself and I feel like I can tackle the flowerbed situation with confidence as well.  I think I can explain my need for guidelines and a list of responsibilities in a way that they'll understand and respect.

The only hurdle I forsee is trying to meet in the middle with Richard on the information debate.  He wants to be the one that recieves and communicates all the information.  But right now he's really stretched thin because he's trying to do bindery work like all of us (which he's only been doing for 6 months of his life and it takes much more time than that to be proficient at bindery work), make sure we don't screw anything up- which means he has to look at every job and work order that goes through the bindery and often go over the specifics with us, train a new girl, get used to the huge volume of work that we're expected to complete each day (and that volume has grown significantly in the last month), delegate jobs in the right order to the right people so they all get done by the due date/time, learn all the specific details about repeat jobs/customers that nobody bothers to write down anymore, learn all the little bits of random information that you can't really retain until you've been around a long time, make sure we're not getting distracted by something and not working fast enough, make sure we aren't doing a job that can wait instead of a rush job (communicate information), judging when we can get all the work done on time by ourselves or when we need to bring in help from other stores, dealing with our defensiveness and attitudes toward him because we don't understand him very well, and figure out how the company runs, like the personality of the company..or.. I don't know how to explain it.  Just the specific nature of the way things tend to happen.  At each company, things occur in a specific way, governed by lots of variables.  Over time, you can predict what is in the near future based on the rules.  Not like legal rules, but more like natural rules.  For instance, I know from experience that when I see a couple of envelopes that look like invitation envelopes, I can expect that pretty soon we'll get the insides for the job and we'll be stuffing and mailing those invitations, even though none of that information is on the work order.  I can expect that it won't go on the inserter because it's a funky size and/or there are too many pieces or whatever.  I know that about the week before the end of the month, the pressmen are going to be cutting a crapload of paper and I know that we're going to have lots of casino mailers on the last two days of the month.  I know that every other month, on the third week of the month, we're going to get a couple of pallets of a popular regional magazine and I know that I need to prepare for a lot of label sticking, sticker sticking, and mail sack filling.  I know that when we need more foam core to tell Matt, but when we need more double sided masking tape to tell Bart.  I know which drivers need to be reminded to pick up their posters in the back and which ones don't.

All that to say, I would like to take some of the pressure off of Richard so he can do his job effectively.  I would like him to be able to focus on delegating work, job timing, overall quality control, and perfecting his own skills on the machines, while I handle the little things like unwritten specifics for jobs, preparing for future jobs, gathering information from, and communicating with other managers about jobs, and handling all the random people who come through and have questions or need help running something through a machine.  He can't hardly get a machine set up without having to stop several times to investigate a new job that just came in, or help the new girl learn something, or put out one fire or another.  He is so overwhelmed by all the distractions that come that he makes a lot of mistakes on his own work.  I really feel for him.  I know that he has the ability to handle all of it eventually but he's really drowning right now and I'd like to be his water wings (lol!).  I don't want to be the supervisor or be in charge of any people.  I just want to ease the burden of the people who are in charge.  One of my sources of satisfaction comes from helping others excel.  Like, when I see Richard about to cut a postcard that will mail, I'll get some mail trays for him to put them in.  If someone's about to work on a job that I know has specific directions that aren't in the workorder, I want to go explain how to do the job and why we do it that way.  If someone is on the folder and is running out of boxes, I'll make a few more for them.  These kinds of things do not fall in Richard's idea of teamwork but I feel that they are important for keeping things running efficiently.

Also, if I have a question about something, I want to ask the person who has the answer.  Richard wants me to ask him and then he can decide if the question is important, ask said person, and relay the information back to me.  I feel that it is a very inefficient way to do things.  Not only does it take a lot longer, but the information can get degraded as it travels through the channels.  If Richard doesn't understand my question well enough, he won't know if the other manager has answered the question to my satisfaction.  Many times I have to rephrase a question before the manager knows what information I'm looking for.  All that time could be spent working on the job instead of waiting for the answer before proceeding.  Our company is all about getting things done faster than any other place can.  We strive to eliminate all inefficiency in the entire process, from the initial job request to the delivery of the product.  Chain of command works in many applications but I really feel that in the information relaying sense, it wastes too much time.  If I go over your head and ask Matt or Chris for information that you don't know (and have no way of knowing), it does not mean I don't respect your authority.  It means that I eliminated two steps in the process of getting my job done on time.

Well!  That was quite the rant, wasn't it!  I don't know that it was a rant spcifically, more of an explanation of my thoughts.

I've been at the company longer than any of the other bindery folk.  I have an intuitive sense about the jobs that come through.  I don't often get overwhelmed by the work volume because most of it is something I've done many times before.  When a new type of job comes, I'm excited for the diversity.  All the hundreds of individual things (jobs, events, etc.) of the workday seem like a flow of small particles and they seem easy to manage and prepare for.  But I know for Richard, each job or new event is more like a brick hitting him.  Because he hasn't had the time here that I have, each individual job is its own thing, its own problem, whereas for me, it is a small piece in a continuous flow.  I can view the work in the shop as a whole and I can recognize the individual pieces of the whole as just parts of the picture.  I'm not sure if Richard can see the whole picture because he keeps being bombarded by bricks in his face.  When I first started, every job was a brick, or a concrete block!  But over time I was able to conquer each brick and the bricks became smaller over time until they all became particles in a flow.  That view took at least two years to acheive.  At my 6 month anniversary I was still being pounded in the face all day!  I can't imagine being put in charge of all those bricks at 6 months!

Well.  Um...

I made sugar cookies.  I'm finally caught up on birthday baking and so I make cookies because I wanted to!  I made lots of spring shapes with lots of bright spring colors.  I increased my knowledge and skill in the cookie decorating area and I have lots of ideas I want to try the next time I use frosting.  Which will be tonight I think.  We're going to the inlaws for lunch tomorrow and I have extra frosting so I thought I'd make a cookie cake.  I should probably call them so they don't fix a dessert.

I think I'm going to take a walk in the park with my trowel and a bucket.  There are many escaped lansdcape plants in the park and I don't think anyone would mind if I removed a few.  Gotta love invasive species...

Sometime this weekend I plan to make a pictures post.  But for now, I want to be outside!!  It is cool and overcast and it smells like rain.  I haven't smelled rain in forever!

Wind

The wind has been the story lately.  The other day there was a wind gust of 71mph in Oklahoma.  I don't remember the town though.  Our average wind speeds have been in the 20's and 30's.  All the plants are unhappy.  Even the hardy native ones.

When my plants go out now they go on the front porch to stay out of most of the wind.  They came inside the other night when it got down to 34 and I'm going to put them back out as soon as it warms up some more.  It's almost 60 now and they could technically go out but I was cold when I went out so I'm going to wait.

Work has been stressful.  The actual work part is fine but I'm having trouble understanding what my new supervisor wants from me.  He seems to want me to operate in a way that is opposite from what the owners have aways wanted.  He wants me to ignore everything that is not currently in bindery.  But I have saved countless jobs from going out wrong because I pay attention to the whole shop.  And I have been thanked repeatedly for doing that.  The owners have specifically told me to take more initiative but the new supervisor wants me to not take initiative at all.  He doesn't want me to think for myself (it seems).  Basically what he's said is he wants me to do my job and that's it.  I can take initiative, depending on if my thinking is correct or if it's a good idea.  He doesn't want me to plan ahead for jobs or for upcoming events.  The most difficult thing is that he gets really mad when I either do things a different way than he would and then defend myself or if I question something that he's doing (because I've been here and I know that it's not going to work his way).  When I try to communicate to him about it he doesn't understand what my problem is because I do good work.  I KNOW I do good work.  That isn't the problem.  It's all the stuff that happens that isn't actually a job.  I'm not really sure what to do.  I have a hard time talking to anyone about it because I start crying.  I only cry when I'm frustrated.  I'm really frustrated right now.

Also, the flower beds at work have me frustrated.  The owner told me to buy plants and make it look good but he didn't mention to the lady who is technically in charge that he told me that.  And then he kept saying I should do what I wanted and he doesn't have any preferences but then it turns out that he had strong preferences about lots of things and now I have to take stuff back to the nursery because he refused to tell me he didn't like it!!  No communication at all.  I'm going to have to let L (lady in charge) know that either I need clear guidelines or I'm not going to mess with the beds any more.  And then when the lawn guys mulched they pulled out some of my plants.  RRrrrrrrrrrr...

So lets concentrate on home, shall we!

Yesterday we were productive.  We tacked up the ugly TV cable outside our house, cleaned the garage for 30 minutes and got a nice big corner done, and cleaned up debris on the side of the house.  I also removed a couple of wasp and mud daubber nests from the eaves, cleaned the litterboxes and the fish, moved the forsythia and put a yew in its place, potted up plants to take to the Spring Fling next weekend.  I even discovered that I hadn't gotten the lid to the snake tank closed all the way and now Garak is MIA.  I searched all over and found no evidence of poo or remains.  I looked at Tuvok's piles in the back yard and found no bones in them.  I did find a suspicious tunnel in the front flowerbed.  It could be him or a toad.  I disrupted a toad in the adjacent bed yesterday so it could be his house.  I'm a little upset with myself about this.  I do know better.  The good thing is that snakes are hardy and resourceful creatures and he's probably ridding our house of mice.  I think we'll probably run across him one of these days.

Today we have errands to run.  WalMart, PetsMart, CVS, etc.  I need to make banana bread and peanut butter cookies.  I think I might take pictures of the yard today if the wind cooperates enough.  I haven't given you guys a virtual tour in a while.   Oh!  And I need to make door prizes for the Fling.  I am really excited about it!  I'm dragging DH along this year.  He's not real thrilled about it but I know he's going to have fun.  Several of the other DH's are just the kind of guys that he enjoys talking to.  I still don't know what food I'm going to bring...

I discovered another spider egg sac while I was removing unwanted nests from the house.  The folks on Garden Web seem convinced that it's the same species as the sac in my kitchen window.  Argiope aurantia, yellow garden spider or golden orb weaver in other regions.  But the two sacs have fundamental differences that really make me feel like they are from two different species.

Argiope aurantia

ID TBD

I'm going to submit them to What's That Bug.com and see if they know.  I'll probably have to wait a while for my answer and that's ok.  They're busy.  It isn't impotant that I know right now, but I do need to know eventually.  Just because it is something I don't know and I don't like knowing that there's something I don't know.  Like a bit of information I don't know.  Skills and entire subjects are one thing, but a bit of information to make my world picture clearer is important to me.

You know, when I was a kid I thought that by the time you were an adult, you had yourself figured out and that your personality was pretty much set at that point.  I thought that since the body stopped growing and changing (more or less), that the mind did too.  But I think that my mind has evolved more as an adult than it ever did as a child.  My "who I am" has changed significantly over the last decade.  Many things are still the same but some very fundamental traits have shifted.  I'm really starting to understand life as a journey of knowledge and change.  I'm learning more about myself and I'm discovering the power to improve upon who I used to be.  I still remember the time of my life when I discovered that adults were not perfect.  I always thought that by the time you were a full fledged grownup, you knew enough to not make any mistakes.  But around 18-19 years old, my little world started falling apart.  Grownups don't have all the answers.  They screw up.  They make bad decisions.  They have flaws.  It took a few years to come to terms with that realization.  Then I had to discover that a person can be flawed but still be worthy of love and respect.  You don't have to be good at every part of life to be worthwhile.  You can have flaws that make you inept in some areas but you are really great at other areas and that's where community comes in.  Everyone together creates a whole.  I'm still trying to figure out what flaws I need to try and fix and what flaws I can just let be.  No one gets to be perfect.  In what ways am I content to be less than perfect?  What people around me fill in my gaps?  How do I fill in the gaps of my friends, family, and coworkers?  The gaps that still remain in me after others fill in with their strengths are the ones I need to work on the most/first.

So that was an interesting thing that came out of my brain...  I have not had those particular thoughts before. 


Too much thought.  Time for a kitty!



Lillibutt's nose



Houseplants and Tuvok