You probably think I fell of the planet.  Some days I wish I could.  I'm learning how to stand up for myself, how to stop a meltdown when my emotions start overwhelming me.  I'm learning how to convince myself that I'm not bad and the ones who are lying about me are the bad people.

DH keeps saying I should just quit and find another job.  If I do that, they win.  I'm not going to let them win.  If I leave, there's no one to dispute all the lies and rumors. 

Things are eventful on the home front.  Three weeks ago I got the flu.  Well, I'm pretty sure it was the flu.  It was too nasty for a cold and people who got a flu shot didn't get sick.  Came down with it on a Thursday, and that weekend we went to Kansas City to visit DH's grandparents and go to the Chiefs game.  I was miserable but we aren't going to have that kind of opportunity again.  DH really wanted to go to the game.  I had never been to a pro football game.  It was pretty neat.  Would have been neater if the Chiefs had won... 

I went to work on Monday for two reasons: 1. the last time I called in sick, someone told every single coworker and boss he could find that I was faking it. and 2. the last time I called in not-sick (asked permission!) I got yelled at and fined a vacation day.  So now I have a new rule applied to only me.  If I'm not sick, I have to take a vacation day.  So yes, I took a vacation day to go to my doctor appts.

But anyway.  I went in just long enough to show everyone that I really was very sick and I left about 10:00.  So there.  Lie about that one, I dare you.

I didn't really feel better Tuesday morning but I had the same plan; show everyone I was sick and go home.  Well, I started to feel better and made it the whole day.  The sinus and chest congestion was still bad but I was no longer 'sick' sick.  By that time DH got sick.  He stayed home from Tuesday on.  I admit I was pretty jealous.  On Friday I came home and he asked me to get up and get something for him (even though his flu was better) and I kind of unleashed on him.  Told him I only got 3/4 of one day off and I went on a trip while I was sick, plus my mucus wasn't going away and I still felt like crap and I was exhausted and I wasn't taking care of him any more until I got some sleep.  And then I immediately apologized of course!

He was having stomach pain, he thought from eating too much pizza at lunch.  I gave him some alka-seltzer and went to bed.  He woke me up at 1:00am to go to the ER.  Nothing was helping and the pain was up to an 8 out of 10.  He kept apologizing because of my outburst earlier and I had to keep convincing him that I had no idea he was in this much pain when I said that. 

So we sat in the ER until about 4, went back, the doc poked on him a minute and decided on a CAT scan.  During the scan I took a 20 minute nap, bringing my total to 3:20.  But it really helped.  Doc said they were sending the results to Australia to be read since it was daytime there.  Less mistakes from grogginess.  We had a 45 minute wait ahead of us, except this time DH got some IV pain meds.  By 45 minutes, they meant 5 minutes.  We barely got settled and he came back and said DH had appendicitis!  I thought he was joking; DH actually laughed at him!  He was like, no, seriously.  You're having surgery today.

...So DH got admitted and sent up to a room while I went home and fed the pets and me, and packed a bag.  I texted Mom and she was like We're on our way!!!!  and I was like No! Wait!  That's not what I meant!  I was just letting you know.  You don't need to come!  Apparently they can't take no for an answer.  They showed up like an hour later.  I did get about 45 minutes more sleep before they got there though so that was nice.  The nurse brought me a cot and DH didn't even ask for one!  I was curled up in the window seat when he came in.  And of course in my sick/exhausted state I said, Is that for me?!?  Lol!  Duh.  That cot was pretty much my bed and chair and table for the whole weekend.  I scooted it up right next to the bed so I could touch DH's arm when I layed down.

So anyway, the surgeon came to visit and said it looked and smelled and talked exactly like appendicitis so once he got an emergency hand surgery out of the way, DH was up next.  They took him at 11:00 and we went down to the surgery waiting room and watched OSU beat up on Texas Tech.  FIL showed up too.  I worked on Tuvok's wool sweater, but then realized I did it wrong so now I have to rip it all out.  Still haven't done that.  Have to work up to it. :-)

As soon as DH was sewed up, there was a code blue so the surgeon had to take care of that but then he came and said everything went fine.  So we went back up to the room.  FIL and my parents left and I think they were still in the parking lot when I fell asleep.  I woke up in time for dinner and went home to feed the pets and let the dog out.  My aunt was in town chaperoning some teenagers for the anime convention.  I met them at the sushi place and then later my aunt visited us in the hospital.  She told us some medical horror stories that I hadn't heard yet.  I was too young when they happened so I never heard about them.  My youngest aunt almost died even more than I was aware of!

But anyway, that night I slept so hard that I never knew the vitals people showed up every two hours, never knew there was a night nurse, never knew DH had a reaction to the oxycodone, nothing.  By the time I came to, the day nurse was back and DH was on percoset.  One more trip for the pets, another nap, and we got discharged around 3:00 Sunday.  I got DH set up in his recliner with all the ammenities, and I think I went to sleep again.

On Monday I was told that I wasn't expected to be there.  Whatever!  After all the crap they've put me through?!?  I wasn't sick and I didn't want to take another vacation day!  I stayed until I had to go to the Endocrinologist after lunch.  Then DH made me an appt with my GP because my sinuses were still nasty.  Not bleeding anymore, but still not better.  She gave me some antibiotics.  Also, I've gained a lot of weight.  Ugh. 

But anyway, DH got a second week off work and I started feeling better by about Wednesday.  I did nothing each evening except sit on the couch and go to bed early.

So now we're 3 weeks behind in the housework, I don't know how long since a grocery trip, and the MIL is freaking out because I didn't plant her tulips yet.

Yeah, I kinda want to fall off the planet. :-)

Also, Christmas is coming...